My blog.

I just took a nice little trip down memory lane and read every one of my old blog posts, all the way back to almost 10 years ago now. It's funny how sentiment bring me to this place; it never fails me. I can leave it for months, years, and it's blank pages are still here waiting for me. Sentiment. Tonight's is because my baby girl turns four tomorrow. If you knew me only by my blog, you wouldn't even know that I have four kids now. Late in the afternoon on June 11th of 2014, my screeching little princess came into the world--and just like that our hearts and family grew bigger than we ever knew was possible. She is our whole world. She is so bossy. She is so funny. She is so smart and determined and personable. She knows no stranger and she is brutally honest. What was life without her? And just like that four years have gone by and I haven't even written a blog post.

All my posts have a common theme interwoven throughout...it seems to remain constant through the years...sentiment...the feeling of my children's little years slipping through my fingers so fast. I haven't put writing on the front burner in a long time because one: four kids; two: was getting my Master's Degree; three: working mother; four; everyone plays sports and I work and volunteer at school all.the.time. But, it never lets me down...every time I feel the need to come here; its here.

The more things change, the more the stay the same. My Aiden, who I blogged about starting Kindergarten will begin his last year of Middle School this year...one year left until High School. Teenager. 13 years old. How is this real? He doesn't love baseball anymore...he fell out of love with soccer for a new love of football...and now is trying to work things out with soccer, so we will see how that goes. He's still amazingly smart and is such a great kid. I am more proud of him than ever. Now if he will just turn his homework in on time that would be awesome.

Addison and Aila are beautiful and smart and just the best kids. They are going into 4th grade this year.
I cried when I read on Aila's final report card that she was "promoted to fourth grade", and she called me out in front of the whole class--"MOM, ARE YOU CRYING?!?!" Aila is such a leader and such a good friend. She is in Student Council and is such a good example. She is really very wise beyond her years and is so mature and responsible. She is such a good friend to me. Her and Ava are so strong-willed and one or both of them will definitely be President one day. She is so athletic; a great and aggressive soccer player who recently unearthed a newfound love of basketball, so we will run with it and see where it ends up. She is so good at math and is first to finish all her her fast-facts tests. (She did not get that from me.)
Addison is the most beautiful girl in the world and has the most gentle heart. She is definitely the most easy-going person in the family (besides me, heh)...she doesn't complain; she's so tough; and she always compromises. Her gentle spirit reminds me so much of myself. She is such a great friend and is a great athlete and artist. She rocks her Spelling Tests with almost 100% every single week. She really enjoys volleyball and says she wants to try cheerleading soon. Ava always says "Addy is my best friend". She's such a great sister.
Ava, my baby. Well, what can I say. Last year was her first year of preschool at Heights and she was in Ms. Flor's class. She is in her element at school. The kid knows no timidness. She will literally see a kid across a mile long field and run to make friends with them. She is so wonderfully wonderful. She will start 3-day a week Pre-K in the fall and then...Kindergarten in the fall next year. Then this blog will have gone full circle. From before Kinder of my first to before Kinder of my last.

We only have Aiden for 4.5 more years and then we are down one, three to go. And then...I don't even want to think about it. Life is so short. Tonight was the last night I will have ever kissed a three-year old baby goodnight. Tomorrow my three year-old baby will be a four-year old girl. No more "milky" at night before bed. No more baby stuff in my house. At least she still sleeps with her Beesy. Please, God, let her sleep with that thing forever.

To the Kisser of Boo-Boo's

My kids will never know the pain of watching their daddy drive away. They will never press their faces against cold windows with clenched fists and wet faces watching their kisser of boo-boo’s drive out of sight like I did. I believe that with all of my heart. Their daddy is a man who lives up to the title “dad” with every ounce of his being. He was by my side when our beautiful babies were born and oh, how he looked into their faces and took their tiny bodies in his strong arms and loved them from the moment they took their first breath with a fierce, fatherly love.  For ten years now he has been there for every goal scored, every tackle made and every run that was slid across home plate. He was by my side as we watched our girls dance to Taylor Swift in the talent show and he cried because he was so proud that our babies were brave enough to be on that big-ole stage in front of all those people. He was by my side in the doctor’s office the day they told us there was no more heartbeat, and then he was by my side when we found out God blessed us again, with a third, and final daughter.

Our children will know no greater love than that of their daddy. He is the leader and provider of our home, the reader of bedtime stories, the maker of killer mac-n-cheese, and the kisser of boo-boo's. We admire him to the moon and back.

Thank you, Chase, for being ours and loving us so good. There’s no one else I’d rather have by my side for what's next in our story. Thank you for giving us a home full of love and laughter, and thank you for making us feel safe. Being a parent isn’t easy. Like you said, "it’s the greatest and saddest job a person could have”....rocking your babies, changing dirty diapers, driving to practices, breaking up fights, pushing swings, breaking up fights, reading stories, loving them, building them up, and then they’re grown and you're sending them on their way. They’re lucky to have an example like you to fall back on when they’re out there in the big ole world.

We love you.

Happy Father’s Day.

worst blogger, ever.

I know.
It's been 7 months since I've blogged. Or SAVEN, if you're from Albuquerque.
I suppose you could say a lot has happened. First of all: school.
I am so close to being done, I can smell it. The hard part is over, I'd like to think, and now the worry is passing my boards & finding a job. (Do I want a job? Maybe I'll start on my Master's...Med School? Astronaut school?) Hmm, I digress.
It's so close I actually told someone today, "Hey, next time I see you, I'll be a nurse!" Dude.
It's safe to say that I am...scared. They said this would happen in Level 4...they said we would be scared. They were right.

In other news...

House is coming along. Umm, wow. Remodeling a house is not a small task. NOT for the faint of heart! I still feel like it's not "there" yet. But it's far from where it was. Hopefully we can tackle some final projects here soon.

Zee Guest Bedroom

Living Room

Anyway, Valentine's Day is coming, and that should be fun...<3 nbsp="" p="">

Love Love Love!

And maybe next time I write here...I'll be a nurse.

Call me, maybe?

Let's get down to business. I'm spending 7-hour days with cancer patients, going to 3-hour lectures, MOVING, REMODELING, my business, mothering, churching, wife-ing (wifing?)...Just trying to find a steady little balance. It's a challenge, and, well, I like love it. (I need help, people.)

So, yeah. I have no reason to write this post. I usually only write when I'm feeling particularly contemplative or the writer's bug bites me, but today, I think I'm just happy that I have an empty agenda and a blank space to chart it. And, although I'm pretty sure no one in the world cares about how I have about 6 loads of laundry to do today, how many things I need to pack, etc. that's what today's all about, and today I get to tackle it! HOORAH! Hmm, maybe I need to make up some "house-cleaning pump-up" chant. Or better, I can turn on Pandora and jam out to Carly Rae Jepsen.  She currently makes me stupid-happy and giddy like I'm twelve. Ok, fine, eleven.  (Don't judge.)

...........................................................................................................................................

So, one another completely unrelated note, Stephanie finally really did move...it sucks...especially since I go to Starbucks alone now while she posts pictures like these on Instagram. 

.........................................................................................................................................


Anywho, life is good--as always. And I'm super pumped to let the home-decor/design-freak inside myself loose on this new house. But, as for right now, the house looks like more like a demolition zone and less like a cozy home. But, hey, you gotta start somewhere! Here's some before and after shots of the work so far.

Living room before & after paint (still in progress):

(The photos below are of child labor, FYI.)

 New fridge. Check out the gold light fixture in the background. Sweet Jezuz.

 Kitchen paint, awesomeee:

The Help:

Master bedroom paint...don't you love the rainbow looped office-building carpet and vertical blinds? I know, me too.
..................................................................................................................................................................

Until next time!

Sometimes, I write to appreciate.

There’s a book open to a page with a whole lotta information about hypertension begging for some attention, & a cold, empty cup where green tea was steaming a couple hours earlier. The sound of my blog playlist is mixing with the rumbling little purrs of Ben laying next to me on the couch, & I’m having that feeling that I have every once in a while when I remember that, this life of mine? It’s happening. Right now. And all the planning, dreaming, waiting, wishing, & hurrying I do on a daily basis takes a back seat… for a second.

 I wish I could remember to do this more. Look around and realize, hey, look at my life…look at my life right now, right where it is. Look at the toys on the floor that my babies left there because they’re still little. Look at the dishes in the sink from dinner because I have a family who counts on me.  Look at me being a midnight-blogger because I don't have a quiet moment in the day. Look at my books stacked a mile high because I’m in school and I’m learning & stretching myself and that’s really freakin’ cool. Thankfulness; savoring the moment; seizing the carp.

...back to my ‘unthankful-place’, I realize that my throat is still feeling scratchy & since I’ve taken Emergen-C mixed with too many cough drops & not enough food, not only does my throat hurt, but now my stomach does, too. My stomachthroatache is complimented by the nightly contemplation of how I should do something about my study avoidance habits. I open the book;  I set it down next to me, and since the book is actually open, and I can technically see words (maybe in my peripheral vision),  I am convinced that my brain might subconsciously soak, process, and store them. {#heyanythingspossible.}

And then, I look at the clock and the time says ’12:49 AM’, and I suppose I should go to bed. And having taken these little feelings and savored them, and put them down on paper for all to see…it solidifies & immortalizes them, you know. And I feel clearer- for what it’s worth.  Now, I’ll go to sleep in my bed that has crumbs in the sheets and let all my studying sink in. 

Too awesome not to share.

http://momastery.com/blog/2012/01/29/one-two-three-4/

Why, hello twenty-twelve.

Lookin' pretty good: a mixed bag of a little bit of excitement overshadowed by a lot of challenge. I'd like to say that I prefer it the other way around, and perhaps I do. But, for this year...it's on.

2011 was so good to us:

-got two promotions

-moved to a new house

-acquired a new vehicle

-recieved nursing school acceptance letter

-learned to be tooth fairy

-learned how to be a better Santa

-potty-trained two children

-traveled

-visited friends

-stayed healthy

-grew closer to God
-soccer mom'd
-baseball mom'd
-volunteered
-grew stronger as a married couple (6 yrs, baby!)

Goals for 2012:

-love Jesus

-love others

-be patient

-be kind

-be thankful

-balance school & home

-be a good example

-pay off debt (!!!)

-be a good mom & wife

-make a difference.

"Be the change you wish to see in the world." -Ghandi
Happy New Year, everyone!